Marriage or relationships are not easy, things happen, people change or get wrapped up in careers, adult children or a combination of factors occurs, surfacing the just cause of the split. One of those factors infidelity is an affair –the man; usually admits to having an affair.
In an article Why Long-Married Couples Split by AARP it outlines high profile marriages and why they last or don’t last.
As suggested in the article high-profile cases of infidelity usually grasp the headlines, but more often than none, it is only the factors infidelity that brings the real problems bubbling to the surface.
In a survey conducted by AARP on the sexuality of people 45 and older found that the affairs happen for only a relatively small number of couples. It may be a reason, but it is not the root of some marriages failing. The question remains why so many long-married couples decide to split?
In most cases, the reasons are far less dramatic but the catalyst; infidelity gets the blame.
- On the Decline for Years
- Lost Love Interest
- Issues Intensify
- Loss of Job
- Children’s lives
- Personal Ambitions
The above are some of the real reasons and “The Factors Infidelity” Helped it along.
We have all bought balloons for someone’s birthday at one time, or another brought them home. We tie them to a chair or the back of the child’s bed. Over a day or so you notice the balloon starting to lose its lift. Compare this to a marriage, the helium being an element that holds the marriage afloat. If the marriage has holes like a porous balloon then the part that keeps the marriage afloat, starts to leak, and the binding element begins to diminish.
At one time or another we always ask the question “What happened” most likely you hear the statement “We grew apart” Although it is a standard cliche it does not mean it is not the common cause of the divorce or separation among long-time married couples. A sure tail sign of a couple losing helium in the balloon of their relationship is the couple leading separate lives. i.e., –he gets more and more into his work -she gets more and more into her children, her adult children, or gets ambitious.
Although the Catalyst of Infidelity might have awoken the real reasons, it is probably a good idea to try to understand the real reasons why couples get divorced.
It is not an open discussion from any angle but if you feel your spouse is stepping outside the vows, and you are in harms way because of it. It might be a good idea to leave a message. It is confidential, and we understand it is not an easy subject. The Apogean Team provides a no cost preliminary consultation on the subject.